How to sustain motivation

The easy beginning

In the very beginning, it seems all clear and easy. We are pumped and hyped, motivation is dropping out of us. All seems easy and crystal clear. Well, it is all super easy, we are not able to eat almost anything, so there is no problem staying on track. Something like ways to sustain motivation is not in your mind yet.

But things change drastically the moment when we can start eating almost normally. Yes, the restriction is still there, we are a little scared of eating outside what is permitted, but sooner or later thighs start happening and we add some stuff here and there.

What is more, if things go unpunished, we don’t end up directly puking, foaming, or dumping, it is easy to start slacking on the diet. No need to go into detail about what is going to happen if we aren’t aware and we keep doing this. Yes, it will inevitably happen.

So how to stay motivated?

How to keep going? There are so many temptations all around. Everybody is eating what they want, the food is everywhere, people are offering us things that are not the best for us and there are our old habits that keep trying to come back the very first moment when we are not extra attentive.

Things are not easy. At all. But still, it is our new normal and we need to keep going. We need to maintain strong. Keep the diet, do the exercise, plan ahead, and don’t fall into temptation. But the things that are attacking our fragile new habits are everywhere. They don’t let us live. We are scared to get out of the door because we know that there will be something “bad” waiting for us.

Our net of supporters

Yes, we have people at home, who say they are supporting us, but still, they will munch on chips in front of the TV. Pfff… And it is the same at work. Yes, they (most likely) know, we might have expressed our struggles, but there will be the box of donuts in the morning. Sigh…

Have you thought about finding your buddy? Someone who has gone through the same surgery, somebody who knows, who gets it, who struggles the same as you? In an ideal world, this person would live near and you would meet them any time you want. Yes, bariatric surgery is quite common. But you know how things go. Every time you need someone like this, there is no one 100 km around 😀

Still, there are support groups online. To tell the truth, I wish I had known about them when I was right after the surgery and I was heavily struggling. I had no idea what was normal and what not. I felt all alone in the process and it was hard for me. How can you explain to people who have no idea, who can eat and do anything they like that you have limitations, that it is hard for you, and that sometimes you feel like screaming, crying, and laughing at the same time? You cant…

Belong to a tribe

I have read somewhere that if you need to boost and keep your motivation, it is great if you belong to a tribe. A tribe? Are we living in the era of Neandertals? No, wait 😀 How about bari-tribe, or weightloss-tribe, or gym-tribe? People there have some important part in common with what you are aiming at. These people know what you are doing and what your struggles are.

Your old friends

I know that we have our old friends, yes, they might support us (or not that much) as well. The thing is that we are changing rapidly in front of their eyes and it can be scary for them. They had known us for ages with the extra weight and now we easily lose 10kg a month. That is turbo speed. They have never faced anything like this with anyone. It is easy to pass their emotions to us. They don’t mean it, but they might hinder our progress.

Whether we like it or not, people don’t like change. The status quo has been here for ages and now we come and all of a sudden everything is different. That is not good. We are changing so much and so fast that not even ourselves can catch up with what we see in the mirror. Yes, they want the best for us, but sometimes what they think is the best is not what the bari team thinks is the best for us.

This is the ugly truth. They will tell us we are already skinny, gaunt, even anorexic. But we know that our healthy weight is still 20 kg away. And we need to lose it. It is like that.

Don’t get out of the lift too early

I liked a comparison one surgeon used: when you start losing weight, it is like going up in a lift. You start on the ground floor and it is crowded there. On the 10th floor, there are very few people left and everybody will be telling you it is time to get out. But your destination is on the 20th floor. The best view is from there, from the top. So don’t get out of the lift too early. It is tempting, no doubt about it. But you are not going there.

Independent support

Having independent support, people who are like you and have the same goal is the best thing you can have at this point. These people will cheer for you, they will be happy with your progress. They want the same thing as you and they are motivated and they hold the standards high. They are usually laser-focused and they do anything in their power to attain the goal.

These are your people. The thing is that at the moment you may not have them (yet) in your life. They are out there. You will have to get out of your comfort zone and find them. Dont worry. They are usually very happy to welcome new members of the tribe. Show them you mean it, that you are working hard, and that you want it. That moment you are like an adopted sibling. You belong and the support for you is there no matter what.

You may be struggling, but these people will help you. They know, they have tips and tricks, they might have information you still lack. Learn from them. They are more than happy to help you. And that you are only a beginner? It is perfectly fine. Everybody was starting somewhere and somehow. Nobody was born a pro. You will get there as well. It will just take some time. Use it wisely and you will see for yourself that it is so much easier with every stop and so much worth it.

“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step,” said Lao Te Ching. So it is up to you to take it. GO!